Jocks, Geeks, and Dorms
by ShipperWriter
Summary: John and Ronan are college roommates, who have just moved into a new dorm for their last year. And John has a crush on their neighbor, who tends to wear a lot of red. Oneshot, completely AU, slight crack!fic.


**Author's Notes**: So I was taking a break from RL, painting, getting ready to move, and the thought of John Sheppard without a shirt somehow found its way into my head. Fancy that. A margarita later and some encouragement from the Sparky thread on GateWorld, and this is what happens!

Hope you laugh as much as I did!

* * *

John hammered the last nail into the light brown wall, then securely hung the back of the Johnny Cash poster frame on it. Hanging the Man in Black always marked the end of any move. Wiping his forehead against the back of his hand, he stood back and eyed the poster.

"Hey buddy," he called behind him without his eyes leaving the wall, "does this look straight to you?"

John heard a slight crash and winced. "Lamp?" he called out, anxiously.

"Bookcase," was Ronan's deep reply as he entered the living room. He cocked his head sideways, grunted, then turned away. "Looks fine," he replied as he walked to the kitchen, awkwardly avoiding the moving boxes that were stacked up next to the island.

John turned and frowned. "You didn't even look at it, did you?"

"Sheppard, we are not roommates so I can tell you if you hung your picture right, or if that dress looks cute on you." He opened the fridge and pulled out a beer, using the hem of his shirt to twist the cap off.

"I'm not - are you calling me a girl?"

Ronan shrugged as he collapsed onto the sofa. "If the bra fits."

John gritted his teeth, and then loosened a little when he saw Ronan laugh.

"Hell, you've been tense the last couple of days. You nervous about the game this Friday?"

John shook his head. The first game after classes started back at their college wasn't that big of a deal. He was varsity, and a quarterback. He'd played good for the past six years, here and in his high school.

No. The nervousness stemmed from something else entirely.

Ronan nodded his head to the closed doorway. "What about that girl from next door? Tara?"

"Her name's Teyla, and no," he denied, pointing a finger at his roommate, "it's not her."

"The other one? The book nerd who's always wearing red?"

"Not _always_," John replied lightly, and right then he knew he had been caught.

_Damn._

"Look, Shep, if you like her so much, why don't you ask her out?"

He ran a hand through the eccentric hair that everybody knew him for. "It's not that easy."

"'Hi, wanna grab dinner? Maybe a movie? And my roommate's out, so we can go back to my place and-'"

"Ronan!"

He shrugged. "You can phrase it however you like. But all I'm saying is, you had her in three classes last semester, and now she lives next door. I think somebody's trying to tell you something."

"Look, you know I was with Nancy for a long time. And it's … not easy for me to just move on, despite what people might say." He pulled the black t-shirt out of his back pocket, wiped his face, then started to shake out the wrinkles. "And maybe, just maybe, I should take this last year more seriously and focus more on my classes."

Ronan eyed him seriously. "John. How many classes do you and her have together this semester?"

John pulled the new schedule out of his other pocket. He bit his lip, then looked up. "Five."

Ronan just shrugged and leaned back, taking another guzzle from the beer.

* * *

Elizabeth's phone chimed as she neared her door.

_Our study group met late tonight, so I won't be back until later. I'll try not to disturb you coming in._

She allowed herself a smirk, knowing full well that when Teyla said "study group" she actually meant Kanaan. She started searching for her keys and cursed herself for carrying so much.

The door next to her opened. "Hey, Elizabeth."

She responded, recognizing the voice. "Hi, John, how are you?"

"Good. I'm good."

She turned to look at him. "I hate to do this, bu-"

And one of the most glorious sights that she had ever seen greeted her.

John was standing in front of her, hair unkempt as usual, wearing a dark blue pair of jeans that looked too small for him, yet still fit him just right. His shirt was nowhere to be seen, and she spotted a stripe of brown paint across his elbow as he crossed his arms, fidgeting slightly in front of her.

"You need something?" John asked, stirring her out of her gawking.

"Umm, yeah," she quickly replied, trying to refocus her eyes anywhere but the lean chest in front of her. "Would you mind, uh, just holding these for a minute while I find my keys?"

"Sure," he replied, holding his arms out and taking the stack of textbooks and notebooks evenly in his arms.

"So you're all settled?"

"Uh, yeah. Pretty much. Chewie still has to unpack all of his crap, which could be never. But my room - uh, dorm is about as nice as it's gonna be."

She nodded as she bounced her bag, hoping to stir the occupants. "Good."

"Yeah," he drawled out.

She finally found her key, and just then John said, "So, I know it's kinda sudden, and you don't have to say yes, but do you wanna grab dinner? Or something?"

Elizabeth almost dropped her bag as she turned to stare at him. _Did he really just ask her out?_

"What did you say?" she asked, sounding startled but she quickly realized it came off as condescending as he started backing out.

"No big deal, just seeing if you were hungry, that's all," he quickly defended.

She pressed a finger to his lips, shutting him up. His hazel eyes looked curiously at her finger, then jumped up and regarded her with a frown.

Elizabeth couldn't help but smile. "I've been waiting on you to ask me out for the past year."

As she pulled her finger away, a goofy grin spread across his face. "Really?"

She nodded, then turned the key in her lock. "Tonight?"

"Yeah, just let me clean up. Say, twenty minutes?"

"That sounds wonderful."

He grinned again, then nodded at the stack of books. "Should I?"

"Do you mind?"

He shook his head.

She pushed the door open enough for him to walk through, and briefly considered the thought of locking it behind him and pushing him onto the sofa.

Apparently, she took too long.

He leaned over, setting the books down on her espresso coffee table, then stood and moved back towards the door. "So I'll just knock. In twenty minutes."

"Yeah, that's fine."

They heard a knock through the wall. Elizabeth stifled a laugh while John groaned and stuck his head in the hallway. "What?"

"Ask her if this poster looks like it's hung right."

* * *

Thanks for reading! :D


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